It's 'School Time'

Everyone around us is heading back to school.  Our town started today to be exact. All my family and friends have pictures of the "first day of school" up on their blogs.  It's the one day of the year that we all feel a little sorry for ourselves I admit.

We are reminded that we are different.  We are reminded that we don't fit in. Of course we've done it to ourselves,  but...  This the day of the year when my kids think maybe it would be fun to go to school.  Everyone is excited.  The teacher's are nice on the first day.  They get to wear new clothes.  They have fun new supplies.  There's just a feeling in the air of excitement you know?  I think I could read all day, or I could shop all day, or I could go to work with my husband or I could be really "adventurous" and get a job!

Of course this lasts all of one second.  Then I remember the bullying, my crying children after school, my exhausted and crying children in the morning, the name calling, the swearing, the homework, the inappropriate books that are sent home (Liberty learned about homosexuality in her take home reading one night in first grade before I caught that one), the weekly Disney movie parties or worse, (Liberty would have gotten to see the "Twilight" movies if she had gone to school last year with her friends), the unbalanced meals at lunch time, the demand that they be required to eat all their food at lunch time even if a parent (that would be me) sent a note saying that since I paid for it I'll let my children decide when they are full, the 'bathroom' conversations on the playground, the belittling by the teachers, humanism, Marxism, uniformity, cheating, lying.... I'm sure I'm missing something.  We only made it through third grade though. Besides I don't like shopping and I wouldn't get a job.

My friend and cousin (okay distant-really distant- but it's still fun to think of her as my cousin) Rebecca said this on her blog the other day,

So many parents assume that children must attend public school unless they receive direct revelation not to send their children. It has occurred to me that we should be expecting direct revelation telling us that we should give up our time with our children and outsource their education to others. If we do not receive specific instructions to turn our stewardship over to others then we should assume that Heavenly Father wants us to be in charge of the children he has blessed us with.

 Well said.

When I was serving a mission (back when the world was black and white according to one son) I learned about home schooling.  I feel in love.  I saw some amazing families.  That was what I wanted to do.  Every area I served in (Southern California) had family after family who home schooled and recognized that they had the ability to take their kids back.  It was amazing.

I said I would always home school and my husband always said he wanted that too.  I was so excited for them to grow and be big.  Then we moved back to my home town.  It seemed like a betrayal to not send them to school.  That's what all good moms did.  They picked out cute clothes and packed their back packs up and sent them off.  That was what I was suppose to do.  I did it too.  Inside I cried.  I knew it was wrong.  I knew what I was suppose to do but I was scared.  Everyone would hate me, judge me, think we weren't good enough for the likes of them, be threatened ....

We went through the motions for a couple of years.  What was I doing?  My heart was heavy.  My children were miserable.  Dare I ask if should bring them home?  I was more afraid of what the teachers (my friends)  and my family would say than doing the right thing. 

One night after listening to my daughter cry yet again I had a profound experience that I will not share. From that  I knew I could no longer be ruled by the opinions of others, I had to take my children back.  They were mine and they were being destroyed. 

I've never looked back since.  Except for that split second every time this year when I think we could be a normal family and fit in.  But I can never do that again, there is too much at stake. 

So while so many around me genuinely celebrate sending their kids off I rejoice and thank my Heavenly Father that I have my children to hold and love for a little while longer while I finish preparing them for the Great Battle they were held back for 6,000 years to fight in.

Teaching Roles Better

One of the things I've learned and thought about in the last week is that I need to do a better job of teaching my children what their roles are.  From the Proclamation we know that men are to: preside, protect and provide.  Women are taught that they are to nurture. 

I've learned that it doesn't matter if you are married or have children you are still responsible for the discharge of those roles.  I think of Sheri Dew and all her stories of spending time with her nieces and nephews as an example of how to nurture even when not a mother.  Of course how we carry out these roles will look different based on if we are married and have children or not. 

These are our most important roles.  They are more important than our callings, our visiting teaching or our civic service.  Being a nurturer should be our first concern when we look out to others.

I've been thinking about this a lot.  How do I teach that?  How do we live it?  What attitudes do I need to change?

We have always said, "You will nurture and you will preside, provide and protect."  They have those roles down pat.  I realized I could do more than have them memorize it though,  I could help them learn and practice it now, because they should be doing performing their roles now anyway.

The following are some things we did, ideas only for you.

• Determination (10) is now assigned to work outside our home and to take care of it.  He works in conjunction with his father to care for the outside. (lawn, weeds, bikes, gardening tools, etc) We are teaching him that by taking care of the outside of the home he is symbolically protecting our family.  His job when he is a father or older brother/son will also be on the outside.  He will in time provide for us/his family and this will also be done outside our home.  Though not an outside kid by nature he has absolutely loved having this responsibility.  He has become happier and much more dependable.  He takes his role very seriously.  He's not complained once when he is sent outside to take care of the outside.
• For now the younger two boys are inside still learning cleaning jobs.  Determination knows most jobs and when the snow flies he will have more time to work inside and practice those skills.  All of the boys do occasionally get sent outside for chores if there are big projects.  When the snow comes they will probably all work on shoveling.
• Liberty (12) has latched on to understanding that it is her and my job to make sure the house is clean and orderly.  She understands that the littles are just there to help right now but it is our job to keep the inside clean.  Also she helps me with all the cooking, which she has always done, but now she is learning to do it because she wants to serve and love the men in her life not just because it's fun.  She is also improving her sewing skills so she can contribute to the family.  She made three skirts by herself last week and right now she is making a second scripture bag.  She helps with needed mending.

As they have learned to do certain jobs that are under their God-given stewardships they feel much freer and peaceful.  When I told them their new assignments they let out an air of relief.  I was finally letting do what they were sent here to earth to do. Whew.  Glad I realized it sooner than later.

I have a testimony in the teachings of the Proclamation to the World on the Family.  As I live the teachings I know I find greater peace and happiness.

About That Chore Chart

Mmm.  Yes. About the chore chart.  We have had two actually.

In the past we had a 'chore chart' that was specifically for dish detail.  One cleared, one loaded, one set and one swept. Simple.  There was just a little chart on the refrigerator.
What I wanted by not having a chore chart was to teach my kids to recognize things that needed to be done and to do them.  I wanted them to not be commanded in all things.  I wanted them to serve our family by doing the dishes out of love, not because they were assigned. I wanted them to stay and finish help whoever until the work was done.  It's a good idea right?

So I asked my children about having a chore chart.  I explained to them what I thought they could learn by not having one.  They voted to not have a chore chart. It was four to zero.  They only asked that I would make a list of all the things that needed done and hung on the refrigerator until they learned all the dish chores better.  Perfect!

Our housecleaning chores have never really been assigned. We have cards for how to do each job but we never use them. The kids have learned when I say "dust" they know what to do for example. I've always just assigned kids to do certain jobs that day. I'll say you dust, you clean the bathrooms, you vacuum and you do the laundry and they do them. Or on other days I'll say who wants to dust, clean the bathrooms....


After we get that down then I'm going to work on them doing the vacuuming and the bathrooms with out being assigned.  That will be the day!

Again, this is just for our family, our personality and our schedule.

Oh, we now do our house hold chores for a couple of hours in the afternoon.

Finding Our Center

This week has been a week of reflection, prayer, scripture reading and some in depth conference talk reading. Whew!  I have brainstormed and have made lists.  I have cried and I have repented.  I think I'm emerging out of the darkness now to find our center.

We like the idea of having a center.  A center where Christ "lives" and where we "live" with Him.  I have thought about everything I've ever learned in Thomas Jefferson Education, Charlotte Mason, Headgates, blogging friends, "real" friends, family, society, the scriptures and our living prophets.  I have been blessed with so many ideas and so much truth.  I am so grateful for it.  So what is truth for us though? How do we stay centered in Christ and be who Christ wants us to be?  Lots of ideas and lots of thoughts.

I really thought I had it last night.  Then this morning I took my game plan to my husband.  He said it was good, but he said it was too much, scale back he said.  He said I had too many compulsory things going on.  To say I was mildly displeased would be an understatement.  However, I'm submissive and trust him completely and so I went back to the Lord.  Then the idea came to ask my children what they wanted and how they thought being centered looked to them. Duh.

So we chatted.  We had to have a couple of sessions of discussion today because of timing.  (My sweet husband's not home much at all on Sundays-1 1/2 hours total today- so we were winging it without him with his permission).  Their ideas were interesting.  We discussed long and hard some issues.  Some of my kids just said, "Mom, whatever you want to do is great."  That's good. However,  I have two kids that don't like being told what to do, and so I had to talk a lot with them until we all were able to compromise. My favorite phrase of "teach them correct principles" came in to play.  After I had gone over the principles they were able to understand and they were will to submit and act in faith. (I'm talking about things like requiring math here just so you know).

(On a side note that doesn't have anything to do with anything...Today in Sacrament Meeting they were talking about something with the children/youth being prepared and how strong they were.  Imagination tugged my sleeve and whispered in my ear, "We 'know' in our family mom because we have been raised by a mother that knows."  That made me feel good.  Maybe I haven't ruined them).

Anyway....we made some decisions.  It was a beautiful experience.  They are now prepared to submit to our new plan and our quest to stay centered with the living Christ.  Perhaps we will change more later, in fact I'm sure we will.  I think all plans are made based on personalities and different levels of understanding. I think that it looks different in every family.  I have spent too much time doing what everybody else said looked good in their family.  It looked good in ours too, but it just wasn't the best for us, it wasn't us.  Every family is so unique. This time I feel just plain "centered."  I feel as if I'm finally doing it right for the first time.  Not that the other ideas weren't great, they were, but we have a mesh of all the great things out there now and we have a purpose and plan.  A plan that the Lord approves and one that we are suppose to do.

It's freeing really.  I'll post some details over the next couple of days only to give you ideas.

Make Christ the Center of Our Lives

As I have pondered lately I have reflected on this quote from Elder Scott from this past General Conference,

This Easter, resolve to make the Lord Jesus Christ the living center of your home. Be sure that every decision you make, whether it be of a spiritual or physical nature, be guided by the thought “What would the Lord Jesus Christ have me do?” When the Savior is the center of your home, it is filled with peace and serenity. There is a spirit of calm assurance that pervades the home that is felt by the children and adults alike.


The best way to make a permanent change for good is to make Jesus Christ your model and His teachings your guide for life.

I think this would look different in every home.  I'm still not sure what it means to my family.  We are discussing, learning and praying.  I think the wording of Christ being the "living center" of our home to me is especially interesting as I strive to think of things in terms of circular versus linear.

Before I realize that we had all the components of a Christ-centered home.  We had prayer, scriptures, fasting, Family Home Evening, regular temple attendance, church attendance, tithing, service, etc.  However I'm not sure that Christ was actually the living center of all of that.  It was just sort of assumed.  Sure we talked of Christ and we did everything for Christ, but I still think we were missing it.  Christ was a far off goal in the distant horizon, He wasn't the living center of our lives. 

Being the living center He is real, He is always present, always teaching and we are always learning.

Just some musings....

What I'm Learning and Some Clarification

It is such a blessing to change and learn new things about myself.  This life is about progression and I am grateful to be a part of a mortal experience.

I wanted to clarify just a bit to make sure you all understood that when I said I was taking down my idols you understood that to be symbolically.  While I technically did take down my chore charts and family schedule I did so only because I learned that mine were wrong.  I knew that I needed to have a different focus.  That would be a God focus.  I just hadn't included God in it.  Sure it had good stuff, but it wasn't God's plan for my family.  Duh. 

So I will be rewriting them.  They will just be different.  I haven't even had the brain power to think about my goals yet, but I'm excited to change some of them around.  I have learned, like I expressed (probably poorly), that my goals were all performance based.  I think some goals should be performance based, they help us grow for sure!  However, I am literally all performance based.  I am the queen at multi-tasking, goal accomplishing, never late, always pushing myself, more, more, more etc., etc.  Sad but true.  Can we all still be friends?  I may need some one to hold my hand. Sigh....

My goals will look more like this; have more patience with my children, take time to really listen to my children, make sure I laugh with them, make an effort to show my visiting teaching sisters that I love them, make sure the primary children I lead know that I love them, etc.  Does that make sense at all?  I know there are some out there that are the exact opposite of me.  They need to set goals about when to wake up, have a schedule, make a list, etc. etc.  My problem was that I literally couldn't just BE.  I have always had the attitude that I need to be constantly accomplishing something.  If I was awake, I had to have a purpose.  Either I was reading, cleaning, teaching, cooking, fixing, list making (!), etc.  I was always doing something.  I couldn't ever sit on the couch and visit and giggle with my kids.  Now you know how rotten I am.  I'm just grateful I was able to final step out of the box or line I was on to see the whole picture.

I also want to make sure you know that I LOVE books.  If any of you have a goodreads account with me you already know that.  I look forward to continuing to enjoy the many wonderful books out there that is world has to offer.  Because I'm trying to focus more on BEing I probably won't read as much.  I read too much anyway.  I average 120 books read a year.  That's adult books.  See, I do read a lot.  So don't feel I'm being extreme if my average goes down to two or three a month.  I look forward to continuing to read great books with my children.  Right now we are reading "Swiss Family Robinson" and we are loving it.

Now that I've spilled forth my guts I really do hope that you can understand me.  I was told I was too shocking, abrasive and not gentle.  I was told I'm usually gentle.  That's good, gentle is good.  Hopefully I'm back to gentle. 

On a happy note, we were able to spend the early morning hours in the temple with Liberty.  Our temple as an "open session" for baptisms on Wednesday's at 6:30 AM and so we can come in early and do baptisms.  She just turned 12 last month so she went last month for the first time with us and now she's been able to go again.  We hope to continue to take her one time a month.  It's been a great experience so far.  She is looking forward to doing them in Washington, DC next month.  Such a neat experience.

Pulling Down My Idols-UPDATED

Over the last two or three years I have taken an incredible journey through ancient Greek literature.  I have studied with a mentor and discussed with friends book after book.  It was an amazing journey of learning.  What is sad though is that my take home lesson from those books was something that I could have gotten if I had just applied myself a little more to the scriptures.  Grrr.  I am frustrated at myself that I was not able to act in faith and learn through the Spirit and not have to sift through the philosophies of men mingled with scriptures to find truth. 
So my take home message from my time in the ancient Greek classics was that our society is shaped by false truths and ideas just as the ancient Greeks were trapped in theirs.  One story from Greek culture is about a man who must go off to the Trojan War.  In order to have good winds to sail quickly he sacrifices his daughter on an alter to the Gods.  He is rewarded for his sacrifice with favorable winds.  Since then I have been searching diligently to find out what my false traditions are and to try to rectify them.

One false tradition that I've found that I have been in is that I think linerally.  What in the world is that?  Perhaps that's not even the right word it's just the word that came to me as I was pondering.  When I think linerally I am always checking things off, making lists (I'm sure you've noticed that), making goals, moving from one accomplishment to the next, mastering one subject or book and then moving on to the next, thinking in levels, stages, steps to the next place that is straight ahead, etc, etc, etc.  In a nutshell it's about accomplishments and tasks completed.

I envision myself on my Rameumpton with my fine speech about how great I am because I can juggle so many things at the same time.  I really can juggle a lot.  So what though?  This is were my false traditions come in.  Society has taught me to be this way.  If I'm good I get a sticker.  If I 'm not I get put in time out.  If I get perfect attendance I get a candy bar and a soda pop.  If I'm not I don''t get anything but, "better try harder next time."  If I make enough points on the basketball court than I get a pat on the back and very cool plaque that says, "I'm the most valuable."  If I don't I'm told, "Isn't so and so awesome they worked harder, practiced more free throws and went to more summer camps.  No wonder they're so good."  If I show up to church on Sunday with my children perfectly groomed with 15 minutes to spare than I'm a good mom that has her ducks in a row.  If I don't than I'm an unorganized mom, that others say, "well, maybe some day she'll get organized enough."  If I dress so I'm a cute and hip mom than I'm accepted.  If I don't then I'm not.  It just goes on and on.  If you DO something you get nice compliments, fine rewards and you can smile a little bigger on your Rameumpton.

So I've slowly been becoming aware of that the last couple of years.  I'm all about accomplishments and actions as my society as taught be to be.  Charlotte Mason says that in order to get out of a habit we have to develop a different habit to replace it. Makes sense. So my problem as been how do I replace it?  That's where I've been at for a while.

I've been learning I need to 'be' and not 'do' but I still couldn't figure it out.  Until it dawned on me that as long as I think linerally I will never be able to conceptionally grasp how to live.  One of my son's came up to me the other day and said, "The first dimension is straight right? The second dimension is square. The third is cubed. The fourth is time and the fifth is time travel right?" I said that I thought that was right.  I hadn't studied in a while.  It made me start thinking.  "Ugh! I'm stuck in the first dimension."  I think sometimes I been in the second or third though.  I say that only because occasionally I've had some incredible "a-ha's" and I've learned to get "out of the box." Learning about home education, TJED, Charlotte Mason and a host of other ideas was mind boggling.  They were truth (they were just incomplete) and so I felt more enlightened and felt I had gained more of an awareness.

Now though I see that I need to think circularly.  The Lord has no time and His course is one eternal round.  There is a lot that that means.  More than I understand now.  I don't have to do enough to finally be loved by my family, friends, church leaders or God.  I simply must be.  I need to live with faith, hope and charity.  I need to live in a state of holiness.  I need to "live by every word that proceeds from the mouth of God." (Moroni 7:25 and D & C 84:43-44)  I need to  not " look upon sin with the least degree of allowance." (D & C 1:31 and Luke 12:59) 

So I have taken down my chore charts, my schedules, my goals and my expectations.  I will rewrite them and think in the terms of being. I will be charitable, faithful, grateful, holy, etc.  That will take work but as I live by every word that proceeds from the mouth of God I will become.  To know that I'm not expected to DO any more but BE is the most freeing thing I've ever realized.  Because of course as I 'become and be' I will somehow still DO but it will be the right way with the right spirit and for the right reasons.

I will continue to look at all my false traditions and false ideologies so that I can take them down so I can see the One True God.

SEE MY COMMENT.

Where to begin?

Did you know that when I started blogging a couple of years ago I did so immediately after reading Elder Ballard's commencement speech at BYU-H I believe it was (maybe that's wrong?) that encouraged members of the church to blog and become part of the discussion.?  I didn't enjoy blogging at first, but I've since come to appreciate it.  Most importantly I have been able to be apart of the discussion and find others who are a part of the discussion.  I've learned a lot!  I appreciate being able to learn from others and find friends of like mind since home education is such a lonely path.

With that said I want to make sure every one knows that what I write on my blog are just my ideas and my experiences along my path of mortality.  Like other blogs I read, my blog's purpose is only to spark ideas so others may have others ideas to ponder on.  I often think of it as the pioneer women of long ago that would gather in quilting circles to talk, lift, and encourage each other along.

So once again my ideas  have been taken to another level.  I feel awakened again to more light and truth.  I feel even more peace.  I have written numerous blog posts over the last few days, but all of them were only for me I guess because I don't feel prompted to share them.  So what I will share are just some of the basic ideas that I have had poured out upon me.

Happy reading.

Kindred Spirits

On Friday my very good friend called and said, "Let's go to the Celestial Education Conference."  We had to spend six hours consulting with our families, switching up schedules and talking ourselves into leaving at 4:30 AM so we could be there in time.  Finally a little before 10 PM we decided that we were going to go.  I was excited.  I think that I was most excited to see my blogging friends.  Since it was so late at night I couldn't call them and tell them we were coming.  We'd just have to surprise them and hope they were there.

They were there! So fun.  While there I had some great thoughts and impressions while I listened to the first speaker.  After our meeting we were able to go out to lunch.  We had some great discussions! I'm so glad I was able to go.

On the front row was  Jennifer and Misty aka Misfit Cygnet.

The back row is Lara aka Lazy Organizer, me, Stephanie aka Joyful Saint, Rachel aka Free N' Equal on Misfit Cygnet and Jennifer from Celestial Education In the Home.

I was disappointed to not be able to spend some more time with Karen from The Tale of Our Quest but I'll catch up with her another time.

It was very nice to meet so many others of you out there who read my blog!  Thank you for your kind words and encouragement.  I am grateful  to know that my blog as been inspirational to you. 

It was soul enriching to be around so many wonderful women.  Thank you all.

We Took the Challenge....

I know that most of you who read this also read Misfit Cygnet's blog.  If you don't I really recommend that you do! Misfit continually has topics on there that will prick you and make yourself ask the hard questions about yourself and your family.

Misfit's recent blog post as been one of those for me.  For the last several weeks I have been thinking a lot about how we need to get the TV out of our house.  Now we only use it for movies and we haven't had cable for 12 years.  I'm also really good about saying no to my kids about when they ask to watch a movie.  Still we had it and still it was staring at us.  We had a small 13" that we would play the Wii on and we had a large 19" that was in our bedroom.  We also had a spare 13" that I'm not sure where it came from.

I also realized that I was using it has a babysitter when I had to go out or when I was sick of the kids fighting.  I wasn't letting them learn to "deal" with each other. They weren't learning to love each other unconditionally.  On Sundays I let them turn on a movie half the time (of course it was always something like "Testaments" or "Legacy") but that was just because I wanted a day of rest from them.  Not good. 

Since I was feeling the urge anyway Misfit gave me the courage.  So I decided to put it in the shed.  We boxed up all the movies but five dvd's.  We packed up and put the TV's, the one VCR player and the Wii up.  I took Misfit's advice by doing two things. The first is that we have to move furniture to get them back out.  I reorganized the shed and while there isn't very many things in it our TV things are behind them all.   The second thing is that we will definitely act and not be acted upon if we choose to get them out.  I said I wanted to do it for a trial run.  My kids all know that means they probably won't be seeing them again.  They really didn't seem to care though.  I explained why I thought it was important.  They are always good sports and said sure.  Liberty saw it coming though since she reads Misfit's posts too.  Mr. Patriot just shrugged his shoulders and said whatever you want is fine.  He's a good guy.

I acutally hauled off the record/CD player while I was at it.  It took too much space and I didn't want to dust it.  I feel better already.

Now part of this really is a test.  I want to see the difference that it brings into our home.  To prove the Lord, an act of faith.  We really didn't use it a lot, but it was still an idol in our room.  I've since replaced that wall with our temple marriage certificate, a board about being a family forever and a picture from our wedding. 

I did this once before with the Lego's. Despite the outcry that I had to my inbox about how virtuous Lego's were I put them up too just to see.  See I did!  My children's behavior changed immensely, and they started to act for themselves and not be acted upon.  Imagination said, "Mom, I always use to think about Star Wars things.  All day long, I couldn't ever stop.  Since you put up the Lego's I've stopped thinking about them. Thanks mom."  Today Determination built shapes with the geometric blocks (I got rid of the how-to manual four months ago) and he built some very symmetric amazing things.  His exploration with those was a far wiser use of time than rebuilding a Lego ship for the tenth time and being upset that someone touched it.  We've been Lego less since April 1.  Really it made a difference.

Perhaps you think I'm stunting my children's growth? Perhaps you think that I'm over the top?  All I know is that I've obeyed what I was suppose to and I did try the Lord and I'm going to again and I know that He will deliver me.  It just feels better around here.

Question: How often do you use your binders?

Question: After you have set your goals and collected things you may need for that, do you review/use your binders frequently? Is it something you pull out daily and go over with the kids or less frequently? Is it more of a checklist that you mark off when a certain goal is accomplished or is it more guidelines that just keep you on track?

Answer:  I think everyone uses their binders and compasses differently. Our binder is a collection of several things.  It includes our compass, which is our 6 month goals. Our binder also includes our skills lists that we are working on.  Right now my children have a cooking and a cleaning skills list in their binder. The binder also contains special papers, things they are memorizing, and any thing else they want.

 In our home we keep our binder in our "library room" on a shelf.  Every Monday morning we set new goals for the week during our scripture study.  We all encourage each other to set short term goals that will help us reach our long goals in our compass.  Each day we review these goals.  We look at our compass goals every week or two to remind us what is on there.  Some of us do check off our goals when we accomplish them.  Other's like just reviewing them and know where they are at.

Visit these posts for more information:
Family Goal Setting
The Compass and The Binder
My Compass

You may also enjoy this post from Cinder Mountain Scholars:
The Binder and the Compass

Simplfying My Cleaning

In my quest to simplify my life I have been thinking a lot about cleaning. Part of the reason is because Liberty had a goal to learn more about homemade cleaners.  That made me think about some things myself.  I don't want unnecessary cleaning supplies.  I want things more natural too because "processed cleaners" probably aren't any better for us then "processed food."  I want simplicity!

I found this great little book at the library; it's called Green Clean: The Environmentally Sound Guide to Cleaning Your Home by Linda Mason Hunter and Mikki Halpin.

I learned that white distilled vinegar, baking soda, washing soda, a pumice stone, club soda, castile soap (olive oil base) and Murphy's Oil (vegetable oil) are all I really need.  With these ingredients you can make an easy all-purpose cleaner to clean things or just add water to to some of the above and you are done.  Read recipes below or Click for recipe ideas here. Throw in some rags and some empty spray bottles and we're set.  This is something I can wrap my head around.  I don't want extensive cleaning rules or cleaning schedules.  I want simplicity.

Growing up somehow I missed the cleaning lessons.  I learned the clutter control lessons.  I learned the always leave your kitchen/dinning room clean after every meal; never leave dishes in the sink and always wipe down the counter tops and put the food away.  Some where along the way I missed the deep cleaning lessons.  Did you know you should air out your mattresses and wash your pillows? Yes, I'm the only human on the plant to have never done that.  The kids had fun yesterday washing the pillows in their pj's. They thought they were crushing grapes to make grape juice.

I have listed some simple ideas to clean my home that I learned.  Some I've tried already and some are yet to be done.

• Sink-Mix 1 C vinegar, 1 C baking soda and hot boiling water. Pour down drain to unclog and freshen.
• Counter tops-clean with vinegar and water spray. Use baking soda paste 1 to 1 to clean stains and spots.
• Refrigerator/Freezer-baking soda and water mixture
• Oven-Clean with vinegar and water spray. Sprinkle salt on fresh spills to absorb mess.  For nasty messes like inside the oven pour hot water over it and then cover with a baking soda paste.  After letting this set for a while stains should be easy to clean.
• Appliances-Use club soda on chrome.  Use toothbrushes with a baking soda paste to remove hard to reach areas.  Make a soapy shake in your blender to clean it well.
• Microwave-Place 1 C water and 2 T of baking soda in a bowl and microwave for two to three minutes.  This eliminates odors and loosens hardened foods. Wipe and rinse.
• Dishwasher-Place 1 C of vinegar and run as an empty load every week.  If your dishwasher stinks sprinkle baking soda  on the bottom of the dishwasher after uses to absorb odor.
• Dishes-Place vinegar in rinse water to prevent spots.  Pour soda over dirty dishes and let it sit for a while and then clean.
• Washing Machine-Run 1 C of vinegar through full washing cycle to clean it.
• Floor-Clean with 1 C castille soap to 2 gallons of water. If you have a dull finish mop with a vinegar and water mixture.
• Walls-Vinegar/water spray with a 1 to 1 ratio.  Scrub grease and crayons with a soda/water paste.
• Bathrooms-Use all purpose cleaners and vinegar sprays.  Use soda pastes for hard to clean areas.  Use salt in bath tubs and showers to absorb grime.
• Windows-Use straight club soda in spray bottle.  You can also use corn starch with warm water mixed in a bucket.  Or even vinegar and warm water mixed in spray bottle.
• Carpet-Sprinkle baking soda and leave over night then vacuum.  Or sprinkle cornstarch on the carpet for 15 minutes and then vacuum.

It really sounds simple. I'm going to test all these things out and then replace everything I have with vinegar, baking soda, club soda, etc.  Maybe then the rash will go away on my hands too?

Cleaning Recipes

If I would have known that I would write a blog post about cleaning recipes even a month ago I would have laughed and said, "No, way!" Here's proof that anybody can change!


I love the idea of being more self-reliant with the things in my home.  I've always thought that having home made cleaners would be great.  Most ingredients would store well (baking soda, vinegar, etc) and so I'd always have the basics in my storage.  I have friends that have made and make on a regular basis their laundry soaps and other soaps.  When I hear what they go through to get it done I am discouraged however! I don't want to boil stuff on the stove and strain things. It's too time consuming! I wants some simplicity! I thought there surely must be another way. 

I found these very simple, Deanna simple, recipes in the book Green Clean: The Environmentally Sound Guide to Cleaning Your Home by Linda Mason Hunter and Mikki Halpin. 

All-Purpose Cleaners

Borax Cleaner
1/2 C Borax
1 Gallon Hot Water
Mix ingredients until borax is dissolved. Reduce recipe and put in a spray bottle if desired.
Shelf life: Indefinite in a spray bottle.

Castile Cleaner
1 tsp washing soda
2 tsp borax
1/2 tsp castile soap
2 c hot water
10 drops essential oil of your choice
spray bottle
Mix in the spray bottle. Washing soda may be added to whiten stains.
Shelf life: Indefinite

Scented Soap and Water
2 c hot water
1 to 2 ounces castile soap
5 to 10 drops essential oil of your choice
spray bottle
Mix in spray bottle. Spray on surfaces that need cleaning.
Shelf life: Indefinite

Club Soda Spray
2 c club soda
spray bottle
Shelf life: Indefinite

Scented Vinegar Spray
1 tsp borax
1 T castile soap
1/8 c distilled white vinegar
2 c hot water
5 to 10 drops essential oil
spray bottle
Mix in spray bottle.  Good for drawing out dirt and general cleaning.
Shelf life: Indefinite

Dishwashing
Dishwashing Soap
1 part borax
1 part washing soda
Mix in a container and use in place of commercial detergent. If you have residue (from hard-water) add more soda if you have film residue.
Shelf life: Indefinite

Liquid Dish Washing Soap
Castille Soap
Distilled white vinegar
Grate soap and add to dishwater. Add vinegar to rinse water to give glasses extra shine.

Furniture Polish

Furniture Polish
3 parts olive oil
1 part distilled vinegar
Mix and use. 
Shelf life: Discard after use

Laundry

Basic Laundry Detergent
1 part borax
1 part washing soda
Mix in a container use in place of commercial detergent. Add more soda if you have hard-water.
Shelf life: Indefinite

Starch
1 T cornstarch
1 pint cold water
Dissolve cornstarch and place in a spray bottle.
Shelf life: Indefinite

Natural Bleach
1/4 c washing soda or borax
Add to each laundry load with the wash cycle to whiten whites and brighten colors.

Natural Whitener
1 c fresh lemon juice
half-filled bucket of water
Add lemon juice to water and soak clothes overnight.

All-Purpose Stain Remover
(Good on blood, chocolate, mildew, mud and urine).
1/4 c borax
2 c cold water
Mix the borax and cold water together and soak stained clothing. Wash as usual.

Simplfying my Life

Since I found Headgates I have massively dejunked my house.   Since I never was a pack rat before and I was a queen of organization I was very surprised to see how many things we had that we really didn't need.  Too much stuff!!

The first thing I did was I got rid of all our extra stuff.  Everything from movies, spatulas, plastic plants, sheets, clothes to lots and lots of books and toys. Why did I have so much stuff?

Once I started getting rid of  our stuff I was finally able to give up so many things that I had emotionally been holding onto. In that process I learned to think about things in a whole new way.  I finally began to understand what it meant to simplify my life (which didn't mean reorganize my stuff) and I began to love it.

Some of the things I things I've learned include:

• We aren't going to spend Christmas/birthdays on the accumulation of more things.
• I don't want to spend my time dusting and cleaning. Read here.
• I don't want to spend my time reorganizing my organized clutter.
• We wasted too much time watching movies.
• We had too many books that weren't good books. They were mindless books that brought no value.  Abridged books were the first too go.
• I only want to buy quality products now that have lasting value.  I want appliances that I will take to a repair shop because they are worth repairing.  This contrasts my previous view of buying cheap stuff and throwing it away when it ceased to operate.
• We only need one or two extra pair of sheets not a dozen.
• We only need four of five pairs of pants and no more than a dozen shirts for everyday.
• We only need a minimum amount of shoes.
• We don't need a thousand paper clips.
• We spent too much on junk from the grocery store.
• Walmart is a temptation to buy things you don't need and are low in quality. Avoid unless needing the necessary things.  But then are those things really necessary?
• We waste too much paper.  We now only use the minimum. Read here.
• My kids are happier playing with their two or three remaining toys and playing outside than they were before with too many to count and pick up.
• We don't need a play room any more.
• My kids really do choose to read and learn in their free time now.
• I study and am happier more now that I don't feel overwhelmed about organizing my stuff.
• We spent more time together as a family.  We interact, we play and we talk.

I've learned a lot.  Who knew we could live with so few things?  I continue to get rid of more and more things on a weekly basis.  It's amazing to me how many things keep showing up.  I have definately learned to rethink my choices with what I spend Mr. Patriot's hard earned money on.  I ask myself things like, "Is this item worth one or two hours (or five, six....) of my husband's life working so I can buy this?"  "Is this something I really need?"  "What purpose will it serve?" "Will it help us come closer to Christ and to each other as a family?"  "Is it an item of quality or will it break easily?" "Is it easy to clean?"  These things have helped me to pare down what we have.

I can't not begin to really state how amazing it is to be free of so many idols, time-wasters, space-wasters, energy-drainers, and money-wasers.

Challenge: Take inventory of the things in your house. Do you really need it? Get rid of it all! That's what I did.  I learned I could live without so many things.  You'll find that it's all just stuff anyway!

The Friend

Isn't there a TJED ingredient that is called, "The Friend?" I should take the time to look it up, but I won't.  It seems like there is an ingredient for every thing.  If there's not (I really am sure there is) I'm going to make it up.

Ingredient #58962: The Friend.  All moms need a buddy.  A friend to sound off ideas with.  A friend who will call you on the carpet when your wrong.  A friend who will tell you "they're going to turn out fine."  A friend who has a great husband too that your husband can hang out with their husband so you can talk even more with your friend.  This friend also has children with compatible ages for your children so they can hang out with good youth and be an influence for good too.  A nice bonus would also be that they walk in parades with you all summer and support your family while they campaign.

Yeah, I have one of those.  She's great.

They're the type of friends that come over at 9:30 at night at stay for 3 hours, or call before normal people are up just because.  They're the type of friends that when you come home they're taking a shower at your house before they rush off to some where else. When you come home their four year old waves to you from your back yard while he's petting your dog and welcomes you home.  You know your friends been there when your library books are spread all over the house too. They feel comfortable doing that.  That's good. Because of course you've been at their house when their not home using their house for other needed purposes too. 

It would be nice if we lived in the same towns I suppose.  But I would think we'd never get anything done though.  We'd never sleep. 

A friend is there to have a great discussion with.  Just the other night we discussed society and it's traps, Fahrenheit 451,  Charlotte Mason, A Beginner's Guide to Constructing the Galaxy, discussing the classes we were each going to teach each other's older kids this fall together, wearing skirts, femininity, Celestial Education video, wondering when Misfit Cygnet was going to inspire us with another great post, habit formation in our children, waking up early, etc. etc.

While your discussing with your friend you know your husband and his friend are talking about campaign strategy, current events, Homer, Shakespeare, their wives getting up early, teaching their sons how to respect women, teaching their sons to work hard, etc. etc.

Of course while you and your husband are discussing things your kids are off playing.  You know the boys are making forts and leading an intelligence mission as English spies.  The girls are discussing femininity, wearings skirts, talking about the skirts that they made, and the books they've read.

It is nice to have a great friend.  I hope you have one too!

Early Morning Studying

I love getting up early so I can feast in the scriptures.  The house is quiet and I feel the Spirit speak to me. When I am in my regular routine, like I am now finally, here is what I do:

• (THIS STEP AS BEEN ADDED BECAUSE I FORGOT TO INCLUDE IT EARLIER).  I HIDE MY ALARM ACROSS THE ROOM UNDER MY TREADMILL.  BY THE TIME I FIND IT I'M AWAKE AND IT IS EASIER TO GET UP.
• Drink lots of water! This helps me wake up more completely.
• I don't pray yet, I'd fall asleep, but I have a prayer in my heart.

• Go out to the living room and write in my journal.
• Read one or two or three conference talks.  I take notes and think about the message.
• Begin reading my scriptures.   Going from journal writing to conference talks and then scriptures helps to also wake me up and to stay focused.  When I go straight to my scriptures I stare at the incoherently for a while before I realize it!
• As I read I always keep a notebook close by.  The main thing I write down are my questions.  Then I brainstorm.  Get an idea or two.  Do some cross referencing and more pondering.  I think about how the story or lesson or scripture applies to me. I keep thinking and writing.  For me to ponder I have to write.  If I just ponder in my mind I can't stay focused and my mind goes to activities for the day or I begin to get sleepy.  I receive so many great insights when I write things down. I have multiple notebooks filled with my thoughts.  In this way I feel like I am studying the word of God not merely reading it and I am an active participant in communicating with Heavenly Father.
• Now I pray.  I ask about all the things I pondered on.  Are they right? What am I suppose to do today? Etc.

Here's how my brained worked today.  I wanted to think more about the blessings of obeying the commandment to get up early.  I read in D & C 88 at the end of the section and section 89.  I thought about those scriptures for a while.  Then I did a topical guide search on sleep.  I noticed this morning that I've done this so many times that my topical guide natural falls open to the "sleep" page.  I made a column of the commandments to do with sleep and then a column of the promised blessings.  Then I decided to list all the blessings I recognize when I get up early.  This was my list:

• Receive more revelations, personal insight and answers to my prayers when I get up early
• Feel the Spirit more strongly through out the day
• The day goes LOTS better
• I don't feel "behind" all day
• I do a better job of eating healthy all day
• I get more done and I feel productive
• I feel more obedient
• Kids are better behaved because I make sure they get up early too
• We follow our schedule

Then I listed the drawbacks to getting up early.

• I am tired in the afternoon
• I get anxious about getting to bed by the time I need too
• My brain tends to stop functioning in the afternoon (This seems to only occur the first two weeks or so as I get back on my schedule.  After that I don't have this problem).
• I don't get to keep snuggling with my sweetie.

As I reviewed though I realized that I am usually always tired in the afternoon regardless of whether I get up early or at 8.  I felt again that I need to get out side and walk more during the day (I don't like going outdoors.  Maybe I'll talk about that sometime. Silly really.) to help give me that extra energy that I need.  I also recognized that in the afternoon I've a tendency to think that I am entitled to free time all afternoon also and I don't want to be bothered.   The truth is that I'm not in scholar phase any more.  I'd like to have that excuse to keep studying, but deep down inside I know I've learned what I need too and it's time to move on.  I really only need an hour or so to read something deep or write down some thoughts, but I feel I'm suppose to do other things right now.  Sigh, I so love reading lots of books.  Time to move on.

As with all things in life I realized again that doing the right thing simply requires me to exercise my faith.  When I obey and trust the Lord then I see the blessings.  No, I don't want to get up early when the alarm is buzzing, but I need too.  When I do I have seen and will see that I am blessed for obeying.  Sometimes you just have to step out into the darkness before you see the light. 

When I'm done studying after about an hour or an hour and a half I check my emails and maybe write a blog post.  Then I practice the piano to help wake up the kids.  Once they are conscious and moving for the day then I take a shower and continue to get ready.

Fahrenheit 451 Book Review

Fahrenheit 451 by Ray Bradbury

My rating: 3 of 5 stars


This book was very interesting. The world created in the book is in the future where different ideas reign. Chief among them is that books are evil and all must be burned. So this book is about saving books and the value they have on us.

He presented two other ideas that made me think. The first was that his characters all talked about nothing of value and most of the time it was nonsense. Everyone was always talking but they weren't saying anything that mattered. It reminded me of Facebook and texting. Most of what people say is nonsense and means nothing to me personally. I don't need to know if someone earned a chick on Farmville. I don't need to know that someone had eggs for breakfast or that they are anxious or that they are so mad the repairman's late. Really that means nothing to me. Not because I don't care but because a lot of information as been left out, like punctuation for starters.

Continuing on with that thought is that all the books they burned they kept very short versions of them. They were abridged down to 1 page. Also all the TV shows were down to 5 minute episodes and music was edited down to sound bytes because the attention span was lost. Of course the TV shows and books had all lost their meaning and so more nonsense was occurring. Also in the process relationships were lost. People existed together in a state of no meaning.

From the book a character briefly describes an aspect of their world, "We've plenty of off-hours, yes. But time to think? If you're not driving a hundred miles an hour, at a clip where you can't think of anything else but the danger, then you're playing some game or sitting in some room where you can't argue with the four-wall television. Why? The televisor is 'real.' It is immediate, it has dimension. It tells you what to think and blasts it in. It must be right. It seems so right. It rushes you on so quickly to its own conclusions your mind hasn't time to protest, 'What nonsense!....It grows you into any shape it wishes! It is an environment as real as the world. It becomes and is the truth." (pg. 84)

There are other things the books discusses which are all very interesting. I need my own copy to mark it up. Perhaps I will get one?

The book contains swearing and some adult references, but not descriptions. I would say this is an upper young adult read.

The story is choppy, but the ideas are good. He described much in our current society and it hit home. I have mentioned facebook and texting. Also things like MP3 players, flat screen wall TV's, false media reporting, government cover ups, abortions, no need for children, no consequence for choices, and legalized drugs. What is even more interesting is that this book was first published in 1953.

View all my reviews

Some thoughts from yesterday....

I thought I would share how wonderful it is to have a schedule again. Our annual break ended up being eight weeks instead of six, which I think was too long. I am not sure what we'll do next year. The kids were more than happy to get up yesterday and start the day off with our "real schedule"again. Our schedule is much the same as it was before our annual break started. We only added skills classes to our free time option. These are planned in advance and I only plan on doing one a day, we'll see. We also switched up piano practicing schedule. Liberty practices in the morning before breakfast still. I am also practicing in the morning now before breakfast. The boys take turns practicing during family work time. That really works out a lot better.


I guess I also added journal time to our early morning routine. I've been amazed how much they enjoy that. Before we started back into our schedule the boys have been writing in their journal a couple of times a week on their own for the last month or so.

I'm also determined to do a better job about having family time at the end of the day. That was one part of our schedule that I didn't do as well with this past winter/spring.

I also want to say that I have been getting up at 5 AM just like I made a goal too.  I had stopped during our Annual break.  I am much more ambitious when I get up early.  Please remember though that I am not pregnant, my baby is eight, I have no health problems and my husband gets up with the dog.  That all means that I sleep well at night and have not excuse to not get up early and obey the commandment to do so.

The kids did really well at trying to be efficient.  They also went to bed much more quickly because they were so tired. : )  Leader even feel asleep during FHE.  I love it when my children our tired at night.  I feel like I did something right then!

Efficiency

I had some big beautiful plans that once August 1 rolled around we would be able to end our "Annual Break" (TJED recipe) and start right back into our schedule.  And then life happened.  We ended up having my brother and his family, who are wonderful, stay with us for almost two weeks.  They had some complications with their life and their 36 hour visit lasted a bit longer.  Now, we had a grand time but we didn't have a schedule.  Towards the end of last week we did at least start having breakfast at 8:30 again and I started getting up early again.  I have high hopes for this week

So last night we had a family council to go over the schedule again and our family work schedule.  Maybe one of these mornings I'll post about that.  So today we should be "back in the saddle again" as so many say around here.

As I was discussing things with our children and while we were trying to get them into bed earlier than they are use to going at the present I noticed my children have a lack of

Efficiency!

When it takes us an hour to get an 8, 9, 10 and 12 year old to bed I think their may be a problem.  Water breaks, teeth brushing, potty breaks, kisses and hugs, prayers, fighting, more kisses and hugs, in and out of bed.  It doesn't end. When I say it's time for breakfast chores they scatter like the wind and what should take 5 minutes somehow ends up taking 30 minutes.  Does anyone else have this problem?  Of course I realize I shouldn't say they have a problem with efficiency I should say I haven't taught them to be efficient.

New plan.  Teach my children how to be efficient.  I decided that we would start doing vocabulary words. The purpose not being to teach them random words, but to teach them new words and have them apply them to their life.  I'm not sure how long it will last but at least until we get the word efficiency down. So I pulled out my handy dandy 1828 Websters Dictionary and read: "Causing effects; producing; that causes any thing to be what it is...."  My own definition would be, "making good use of your time especially with your stewardships."  

So my first plan was to teach them the meaning. (check) Now to encourage them to make goals and recognize situations in their life times when they can be more efficient.  I plan to review the word daily for a while.  Perhaps if they know the word then they can become the word right?

Abraham Lincoln Book Review

Abraham Lincoln, a Man of Faith and Courage: Stories of Our Most Admired President by Joe Wheeler

My rating: 5 of 5 stars


Why I loved this book:

1). It was well-written and engaging. I enjoyed reading it and didn't want to put down.

2). The author stays positive and doesn't delve into potentially negative issues. He deals with Mary Lincoln's depression and break downs with compassion and understanding. The author deals with Thomas Lincoln (Abraham's father) with respect due to a man who was the father of one of the greatest men who ever lived. He only eluded to the strain between father and son once or twice. When we review greatness we need to look at the greatness and not be seeking ways to tear them down.

3). Points how the mentoring process that Lincoln went through to become great. I especially enjoyed learning about his study of Plutarch.

4). The author points how how Lincoln was a man of faith instead of changing him into a non-believer. The author recounts a comment Lincoln made during the Civil War, "I made a solemn vow before God that if General Lee was driven back from Pennsylvania, I would crown the result by the declaration of freedom from the slaves." Modern scholars have changed the first line to read, "I made a solemn resolve...." and this way disconnect him from a belief in God.

5). I felt this was well researched. He notes that unless he could find official documentation he didn't include it as fact. The author states that many quotes are attributed to Lincoln that may or may not be authentic. He choose to stick to the facts.

6). There were a great many historical events leading up to the Civil War that helped set the war in motion. This book lays out these events and they serve as a good first encounter. Included are the events of the Missouri Compromise, Dred Scott Decision, Whig Party, beginning of the Republican party, presidency of Buchanan and Fort Sumter for starters. Like I said this would be a good first introduction to many pivotal events in American History that youth can study.

I found this an enjoyable read that I will keep on my shelf. It will be the book I recommend to my children when they want to learn about Abraham Lincoln.

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Charlotte Mason's Book Review

Charlotte Mason's Original Homeschooling Series by Charlotte Mason

My rating: 5 of 5 stars


This series is tied for first in the outstanding impact it has had on me in home educating my children. I can't say enough about how great it is.

This series delves into teaching our children all the great things they need to know (narration, nature study, composition, artist study, etc), but more importantly it address the other things that make up a successful human being. The training of character, proper habits, exercise, religious worship and duty are the main crux of her whole message.

Our society may produce well educated children (which may or may not be true), but how well do they function? How well do they respond to change? Are they making a difference? Are they ambitious? Are they God-fearing and selfless?

Mason presents a moving series that left me elevated and empowered with systems and tools to improve my life and my family's life.

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Needs and Wants

My mom is one of my hero's.  Right now she is just coming into remission from battling cancer.  She has had to go through some horrific things the last year, but she is winning the battle.  She still has 1 1/2 years of nasty chemo therapy left, but she is home. 

The other day she was out walking, (she's always out walking), and she stopped and talked to my children.  Liberty knew that this was my mom's bad week because of the chemo therapy and that she did not feel well.  So Liberty asked her how she was doing and how she had it in her to be out walking.  She said, "I don't want to go on a walk, but I need to go on a walk."  That really effected Liberty and the two of us talked about it a lot. 

So I've been thinking about my hero mom.  How many times do I excuse myself out of things because I don't want to do something even though I need to?  The scripture talk a lot about how we can have our needs and our wants.  I tend to focus on the want part a lot.  Perhaps I need to focus more on the needs part of it.  

• I need to get up early in the morning to start my day off right and to obey the commandment to "early to bed and early to rise" even though I'd rather stay in my warm bed.
• I need to walk so that I can have more energy and a strong body even though I'd rather not.
• I need to play games and do family time with my children at night so we can bond and enjoying some "light-heartedness" before bed even though I am fried and just want to read a book and go to bed.
• I need to weed my garden so that our garden will grow strong even though I'd rather not go outside.  I need to quit rationalizing that just because the prophet only said to plant a garden that fact that we should weed, water and cultivate it was implied.
• I need to eat better so I can have the Spirit with me more and so I can be healthy even though I would rather not and continue to partake of white flour products.  

That's enough of my sadly pathetic weaknesses. What my mom said has profoundly influenced me.  I feel another layer of empowerment to stop excusing myself out of things because I don't want to them but encouraged to do the right thing because I need too.

Light-mindedness

I have been reflecting a lot lately on the scripture,

"Therefore, cease from all your light speeches, from all laughter, from all your lustful desires, from all your pride and light-mindedness, and from all your wicked doings." (D & C 88:121)

I have particularly reflected on light-mindedness.  There are several places in our worship that we are reminded to cease from all our light-mindedness.  What does that mean and how do I apply that to my life?  Light-mindedness could be not being serious enough, involving self with irrelevant things and also things that are not of eternal consequence.

Thinking about this is perhaps why I am led to be apart of the Babylon/Zion discussion.  There are several of us  in Bloggerland who are discussing in depth the principals of Babylon and how it is deceptively creeping into our lives.  Some of these influences are evil , but some are not, they are just distractions.  Therefore we are sometimes beguiled into thinking that as long as they are not bad and the prophets haven't expressly forbidden it than it is okay.

These Babylonian devices that keep us from doing the things we ought to do cause us to be light-minded.  So perhaps the discussion could include the following questions. Is watching this movie made by LDS people causing me to be light-minded?  Is reading this book that happens to be by an LDS author causing me to be light-minded?  Is listening to this music causing me to be light-minded? And so forth.... Heavenly Father is merciful and has given us another clue to help us see clearly. He has commanded (commandments and covenants being our protection against the Evil One) us to avoid all light-mindedness.  In this way we have another tool to help us decipher the treachery that exists around us.

In studying though I needed more knowledge on what is involved with light-mindedness.  Is it okay to laugh? To have fun?  The institute manual for the Doctrine and Covenants was a tremendous resource.  Here are some quote from the prophets on light-mindedness. 

"The Lord has called upon us to be a sober-minded people, not given to much laughter, frivolity and light-mindedness, but to consider thoughtfully and thoroughly the things of his kingdom that we may be prepared in all things to understand the glorious truths of the gospel, and be prepared for blessings to come...

Joseph Smith said,

"I believe that it is necessary for the Saints to have amusement, but it must be of the proper kind.  I do not believe the Lord intends and desires that we should pull a long face and look sanctimonious and hypocritical.  I think he expects us to be happy and of a cheerful countenance, but he does not expect of us the indulgence in boisterous and unseemly conduct and the seeking after the vain and foolish things which amuse and entertain the world.  He has commanded us the contrary for our own good and eternal welfare."  (Joseph F. Smith, Conference Report, Oct. 1916)

"The things of God are of deep import; and time, and experience, and careful and ponderous and solemn thoughts can only find them out.  Thy mind, O man! if thou wilt lead a soul unto salvation, must stretch as high as the utmost heavens, and search unto and contemplate the darkest abyss, and the broad expanse of eternity-thou must commune with God.  How much more dignified and noble are the thoughts of God, than the vain imaginations of the human heart! None but fools will trifle with the souls of men. 

"How vain and trifling have been our spirits, our conferences, our councils, our meetings, our private as well as public conversations-too low, too mean, too vulgar, too condescending for the dignified characters of the called and chosen of God, according to the purposes of his will, from before the foundation of the world!"  (Teachings of the Prophet Joseph Smith, page 137)

I remember several years ago that the Leadership of the Church read a letter over the pulpit that asked the Saints to get to the temple more.  They suggested that we would need to give up many of our recreational pursuits but we were expected none the less to become a temple going people.  When I ponder on this I think they were asking us to give up some of our light-minded behavior so that we could commune in our temples.

In the Last Days I think it especially vital that we keep our focus on Christ and His teachings.  As we do this we will not be distracted and drawn into things of light-mindedness.  I have been taught many times that The Parable of the Ten Virgins is not a parable about 5 members and 5 non-members.  Nor is it a parable about 5 less-actives and 5 actives.  It is a parable about 10 active, recommend holding members of the church.  When I contemplate this parable in this manner it is sobering.  Why were the 5 virgins lacking in oil?  Was it because they had become distracted and had forgotten to fill their lamps?  Had they been distracted with light-mindedness and gone off not because they were evil but simply because they were distracted?


I find that catch myself being distracted too much.  I am light-minded.  I am not always contemplating the vast expanse of eternity and communing with God as Joseph Smith taught.  I think that it is very difficult to be fully engaged all the time.  That is why we have the opportunity to repent and try a little harder to be a little better every day as President Hinckley asked us too.  As I try harder I feel the Spirit more clearly to alert me of the light-mindedness out there.  I can more clearly discern the fiery darts that seek to destroy me and my family during the last days.  As I do so my lamp can stay lit day by day and I can be prepared for the day the bridegroom comes.

My Compass

Here is my compass with some thoughts.  I added a "goals with my stewardships" category to my list.  And if I actually post this I'll have to do them.  You'll hold me accountable now....

Core Goals

1. Get up at 5 AM.  The last two months I stopped getting up that early and my production has definetly been lower since then.
2. Go on a 30 minute walk every day.  Charlotte Mason says in book 5 a young women should go on a  "2-3 hour vigorous walk daily."  Since I'm not young I'll try for 30 minutes.  I'm getting older.  I need to exercise.  I control my weight by not over eating.

Books to Read

1. Finish books 5 and 6 in Charlotte Mason.
2. Finish the Old Testament
3. Finish my rereading of Jesus the Christ
4. Read the Aeneid (I'm skipping Plato and Aristotle in my Great Books list even though I'm reading chornicalogically).
5. Read 5 young adult classics- from DeMille's list, (perhaps Olivier Twist, David Copperfield, Ben Hur...we'll see?)

Piano Goals

1. Do a composer study with piano teacher.
2. Continue piano lessons.
3. Learn the musical movements of history and how how to identify them.

Goals with my Stewardships

1. Continue visiting my newly assigned widowed Visiting Teaching sister several times a week.
2. Continue focusing on teaching my children deep cleaning skills.
3. Go through all clothes to check for modesty.
4. Help children with their goals, especially journal writing.
5. Continue to support husband in his campaign goals.

Memorize

1. Kings and Queens of England (I have 1/2 of them memorized)
2. Declaration of Independece
3. Relearn states and capitals with Determination
4. Perodic Table with Determination

Skills Classes

1. Take Pyramid Project (math and science) with oldest two.
2. Continue piano lessons.

To Learn

1. Anything I can!

The Six Month No

It has become time to think about the "Six Month No" again.  It's my least favorite ingredient in some ways and my favorite in other ways.  I don't like it because I have to give up things that I like.  It is my favorite because I feel liberated when I finally give myself permission to stop doing some things and I have more time to do what I feel is the most important for that six months.

(The "six month no" is a part of the Thomas Jefferson Education program.  The idea is that every six months every one evaluates the things they are doing.  They decide if they should stop doing something.  It helps to keep us focused and to choose to do things that are no longer productive and helpful for our current situation).

This time around this is what got axed:

• Writing on four blogs. I only have my private family blog and this one now.
• On-line BYU classes.  I learned a fabulous amount of history in the last three years though.
• 4-H Cloverbud Leader.  No sorrow there.
• Our state's Distance Education Academy.  Lots of reports and testing.  I did enjoy it while we did it.  Great people.  Great resources.  But time to move on.

There's a time for everything though right?  Maybe some day I'll start my classes up again and I'll be able to write for all sorts of blogs and magazines?  For now life is good.  I feel in control again.

Have any of you done a six month no lately?

The Compass and the Binder

Can you tell that I am so excited to be thinking about educational things and goals again???? I am very excited to think about these things just so I am very clear. 

Now that our annual break is over we are moving on to updating our binders and our compass.  Ingredient #16-The Binder, in the TJEd Core and Love of Learning Ingredients suggests making goals every six months.  This is called "The Compass."  For sake of a more creative name we do call our 6 month goals our compass.  We compile our compass, skills lists we are working on (cooking, cleaning, etc), special papers, things they want to memorize and whatever other information  we need to accomplish our goals into "The Binder."

For this six months our compass includes:

• Core phase goals (some aren't in the habit of scripture reading, journal writing, room cleaning, saying prayers, teeth brush, etc without a reminder so they continue to include this until they have habits)
• Books they want to read
• Things they want to memorize
• Piano Goals
• Skills classes they want to take
• Things they want to learn

So far Determination (10), Imagination (9) and Leader (8) are the only ones who have set theirs.  In the next couple of days the rest of us will have written our compass and reorganized our binders. We have been thinking of them though. Mr. Patriot doesn't have a binder but he does keep a six month compass and keeps it current with us.

Here is Determination's (age 10) Compass for the fall:

• Core phase Goals
• Say prayers morning and night without reminder
• Read a chapter in the Book of Mormon before breakfast without a reminder
• Write in journal before breakfast
• Brush my teeth morning and night with out a reminder
• Book to Read
• Eldest
• Greek Gods
• Mrs. Frisby and the Rats of Nimh
• Things to Memorize
• In depth dates, places and key events with all American Wars (He already knows all the wars and their approximate dates, but now he wants to memorize exact dates and battles).
• Periodic Table
• US States and Capitals
• Beethoven piano piece (this isn't from the recital, this is a new one, just because he "wants to")
• Piano Goals
• Learn the above Beethoven piece
• Finish the Orange Faber books
• Skill Classes to Take
• Cursive Writing
• Fractions, Decimals and Percentages
• Grammar
• LEMI's Pyramid Project
• Things to Learn
• American History-Thomas Edison and The French and Indian War very in depth
• World History-French History
• Geography-In depth study of French geography
• French-Alphabet, basic words and numbers

I don't know what his fascination is with France right now.  He's in serious love of learning though!

Here is Imagination's (age 9) Compass:

• Core Phase Goals
• Have room picked up every morning before breakfast with out a reminder
• Write in my journal every morning before breakfast
• Remember to brush my teeth morning and night
• Read for an hour every day in a chapter book
• Remember to say my prayers morning and night
• Books to Read
• The Cat of Bubastes: A Tale of Ancient Egypt
• Usborne's Stories of Shakespeare
• Things to Memorize
• 12 Modern Day Apostles  (He has a much harder time memorizing than the older two.  They had the apostles memorized at 2 and 5).
• American Wars in order (French and Indian War, Revolutionary War, War of 1812, etc)
• Skills Classes to Take
• Cursive Writing
• Advaned Creative Writing
• Grammar
• Spelling
• Advanced Chess
• Piano Goals
• Practice 20 minutes a day
• Finish the Red Faber books
• Things to Learn
• American History-Abraham Lincoln and the Civil War
• World History-Pompeii & Rome and Greece
• Science-Tsunamis and Volcanoes
 

Return and Report

I was recently asked to share some hints and helps with the concept of returning and reporting.  I have been thinking about it a lot this week.  How can we make returning and reporting an easier part of our family routine?  Before we can answer that question I think we need to establish what is "returning and reporting" and why should we do it.

What is returning and reporting?  When someone is given an assignment they are expected to return to the person and give a reporting of the discharge of their responsibilities.  Within the church the concept of return and report is found with those given stewardships and callings.   

In the parable of the talents we learn that a man who "travelling into a far country" gave three servants talents to do with "according to his several ability... After a long time the lord of those servants cometh, and reckoneth with them."  (Matthew 25: 14-30).  This parable illustrates an example of return and report.

Elder Romney said in a welfare training,

"Remember, brethren, to return and report is the final act of the faithful and wise steward."

We also see examples of return and report in our temples, Personal Priesthood Interviews, each April when the financial report of the church is read in General Conference and within the visiting and home teaching programs.  Returning and reporting is our way of being responsible for the stewardships we have been given.

What does that have to do with the home though?  I present that our greatest stewardship is with our family.  Within our family at the close of the day I return and report to Heavenly Father regarding my stewardship in being a wife and mother.  I explain my successes and my frustrations and I seek guidance on how I can carry out my responsibilities better.  I also kneel down in prayer with my spouse each evening and we also pray about our stewardships together.  I think we all do this, but I haven't always recognized it as a time that I return and report.

In a physical sense the biggest way that return and report is carried out in my family is during our family work time.  When we have family work I give an assignment to a child and they are expected to do it and then return to me and tell me they have completed the job.  This is helpful for practical reasons in a couple of ways.  The first is that I know the job was done.  For example my son Imagination (9) often forgets what he is doing.  On a way to a task he might suddenly "see a dragon jump out a closet and he must save the family from the forces of evil." After he has successfully saved us he has forgotten what he was assigned to do in the first place.  So when I haven't seen him in a while I know that the task wasn't done as opposed to hours later when I "assumed" the bathrooms had been cleaned. 

The second reason is that when they report I am immediately able to check on their work.  This ensures that the work is done correctly during family work.  In the past I found that I wouldn't notice the sweep/mop job until much later.  Since it was much later I usually would just "fix" the job instead of them learning from their mistakes.  I wasn't helping them improve and on the rare instances when I did call them back they were irritated at being interrupted for work when they were in the middle of another project.  It just helps everyone! Yesterday for example Liberty (12) vacuumed the living room five times before she was checked off.  But at least it was done correctly during work time instead of later.  Hopefully she will also learn that it's much easier to just do it right the first time!

The third reason is simply to teach them a spiritual principle in a physical situation.  Much like the Law of Moses.  Learn the physical first and the spiritual will be more readily understood later.

These principles can be applied in any area of family living.  Establishing a clear routine for home education that includes return and report is also a great way to teach responsibility.

How can we teach return and report in our home?  Now to finally answer my friend's question.  This is what I did/do with a few other suggestions.

1. Teach them correct principles.  This is my number one rule when I teach my children anything that involves their cooperation.  I/we teach them the principle in a family council.  We discuss it.  We back it up with scriptures and living prophets.  We discuss some more.  They ask a lot of questions.  We continue to discuss it until they will all commit to living it.  This is half the battle of course.  When they understand the truth they are willing to live it.  The next hardest thing after this is remembering!
2. Write down the assignments you give.  I haven't had to do this but perhaps it may be helpful to some.  You can make your cleaning list (or school plan) out a head of time and include space to write who the assignment was given to.  You may even want to write what time the assignment was given and have a space to check when they were signed off as done.  This is good for us list makers.  I think I'm talking myself into making a list now....
3. Keep assignments short. In the beginning it may help you and them to return and report if they have five or ten minute assignments verses longer assignments like "do the laundry" or "clean all the bathrooms." Instead it could be clean the toilet and then report back to me for a report check. This can also prevent a job that is in the process of being done poorly from completely bombing an hour later. This will save tears and mistakes if the correction is made early on.
4. You can make a game out of it.  Perhaps you can make a game about beating their time each week cleaning the toilet.  Of course they know they have to do it right, but if you have a list you can be keeping a record.  That wouldn't be at the top of my list to do, but I would give out beans (Bean Counter Game. See recipe #5 in Leadership Education: The Phases of Learning) every time they remembered to return and report for example.

These are of course ideas. See this post here to generate more ideas about return and report and teaching them correct principles first. Regardless I hope that I have articulated the concept of return and report and you can see the value of it. How do you use it in your life?